And then another friend asked me a question and in answering it, it became even more clear to me that I'm much more than just a crossdresser. That question and my answer is posted below (slightly edited):
Do u wish you could actually live full time as woman? Or do u just have cravings sort of thing?
Mmm. This is a very good question. This is really something that should be answered over a cup of coffee/tea, coz it's not that easy to put down on paper and probably needs an interactive response where the answer will lead to more questions and more answers, etc.. But I'll give it a go.
So to your question.
In a dream-world I would dress fulltime as a woman, with makeup and female clothing and a feminine hairstyle and all that. But I would still be a genetic man (well, "genetic third sex"...I don't really think of myself as male or female...more like some third sex with a mixture of male and female characteristics and brain)and would be totally comfortable with people knowing I'm a man who looks, dresses and walks like a woman. Oh yes, and I'd hang on to my "dangly bits". I'm very comfortable with having them, thank you, and have no intention of losing them. Although it would be useful if I could tuck them away easier when wearing tight clothes or short skirts or lingerie. And I'd still wear jeans and t-shirts most of the time (my standard dress code), but it would off course be a different style and cut to what I currently wear.
But that's a dream-world and will never be reality for me. What I would love is if I could dress up, do my makeup and look like a woman whenever I went out at night. And if I could do that as often as I felt like. And even do that during the day when I felt like going clothes shopping for "Dee" or just felt like going out en femme....Mmm...starting to sound like my dream-world again.
So it's definitely more than an occasional craving thing for me. I really just love and admire woman...they way they look, dress, act, move, etc etc. And I'd like to look that way as often as I possibly could. Maybe it's a need to express the inner-feminine side of me. I don't really know. I just know that I have a need and a desire to look as feminine as possible. But it's more than just the feminine-look...I know that I have very strong feminine/female characteristics and definitely have a lot of "female" in my brain.
So on reflecting on the above, I've decided to change my blog name to "Not Just a Crossdresser".
